How Did They Meet
Romance is always in the air. All it needs is a situation that brings them… face-to-face.
- They went to the same school. He was three years her senior. She was a prefect and he a nobody. They never interacted. Years later, they rediscovered each other on Facebook. And connected. A couple of years later, they met at the school reunion. They made polite conversation and exchanged mobile numbers. They continued to chat. Then, met over coffee. Next, his parents arrived at her house with a proposal. They’ve been married for 8 years now.
- They were neighbors. Lived a block away from each other. It began as a mutual crush but soon turned into a serious relationship. It remained a secret from their respective parents though all and sundry in the neighborhood knew about their relationship. When their parents learned about it, it turned ugly. They were forbidden to meet each other. Undeterred, they married. Secretly. And turned up at his parent’s house in their wedding attire. After much theatrics, all was forgiven. They remarried in a grand ceremony a week later.
- He joined one of India’s most prestigious colleges in Delhi for his under-graduation. She finished her school at her state’s best-known institute. She applied to several colleges in Delhi for admission and got through to the one she wished to. But her father wasn’t satisfied. He asked her, “Is this the best college for this course?” “No,” she said. And told him the name of the best. Her father insisted she try that college. The college offered her admission. They ended up in the same undergraduate program. 6 years later they were husband and wife.
- They met at one of the world’s best-known companies in Gurgaon. They worked the same shift. She took up the job as she didn’t want to study further. He chose to work as he wanted to ‘wet his feet’ before applying for an MBA program. They happened to be in the same cab that dropped them home early morning. Sparks flew between them. Soon they were in love. They informed their parents. And within months, they were married.
- His uncle was a senior officer in a government organization. The organization’s director was from the same community as them. When his uncle learned that the director was looking for a suitable groom for his 23-year-old daughter, he proposed his nephew’s name as a prospective match. The parents met. Shortly he was invited by the girl’s family for high tea. He and the prospective bride stepped out for a tete-e-tete. Upon return, they announced their decision to marry. They were engaged. Over the following weeks, they dated, while their families made wedding arrangements.
- He lived in Bombay and she in Delhi. He responded to a matrimonial advertisement placed by her brother. Her brother met him and approved of him. Then they met a couple of times. They liked each other and decided to tie the knot. In modern times this would be called ‘dating’, and the matrimonial ad the dating platform.
Romantic partners also meet each other accidentally.
In flight, during a train journey, a chance meeting at a conference or a party, or as a business associate–client, vendor, or consultant. Though chances of such happy ‘accidents’ turning into lasting relationships are low, it happens all the time in movies. Both Hollywood and Bollywood have romanticized them sine fine. It makes for an exciting plot, offering creative freedom to the filmmakers. No wonder everyone’s secret fantasy is to meet their romantic partner accidentally! A few even do. And have a happy ending.
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Sometime around 2012-13, how romantic partners meet began to change. Driving the change was new social media called dating platforms. They opened a world of choices for everyone.
Dating apps went a step further than social media, letting strangers connect with each other with an intent to date.
On the other end of the spectrum, the online matrimony platforms replaced matrimonial ads. Matrimony platforms cater to those looking for someone to marry.
Both dating and matrimony platforms have expanded the choices – for prospective partners and their families.
According to a Stanford study in 2017, 4 out of 10 people met their romantic partners through an online dating platform (see the chart below). Meeting organically – incidents quoted earlier – have rapidly declined. The numbers are overwhelmingly in favor of online dating platforms now.
Has it led to better discoveries? More important, to more long-lasting, happier
relationships?
According to a survey of singles between the age group 21 and 40, published in The Times of India in 2022,
- 78% of users said they used dating apps regularly.
- 37% indicated they go on one new date or at least a few video calls or multiple chats with new people on dating apps.
- 28% said dating apps left them more frustrated with their love lives than hopeful. The constant need to appear more desirable and more captivating made them feel drained.
- 41% even confessed to lying to try and appear more appealing and likable.
- However, 29% of daters aged over 35 say that dating apps are perfect for introverts.
While the jury is still not out on the success of dating apps in finding appropriate partners, it certainly has taken the eligible singles by storm.
A sentence from the article sums up the survey results quite well: In today’s world, with no time to focus on anything but work at times, dating apps come as a savior.
